In 2 day’s Daily Squirrel Poo, Prime Minister Theresa May has apparently told Scottish First Minister Nicola Sturgeon to “**** off” and “stop asking for a second referendum on Scottish independence.”
The PM allegedly informed Mrs Sturgeon on a phone call late last night, ending the call just shortly after reminding the First Minister the result of the last referendum’s vote, and in raised tones saying “which part of NO do you not understand, Jimmy?”.
The First Minister had called for a referendum to be held in the autumn of 2018 or the spring of the following year.
But Mrs May said it would be “unfair” to hold a vote until the UK’s future relationship with the EU became clear, by which time it is believed the public would have completely got fed up with Sturgeon’s pathetic whingeing and had her exiled and locked up in Edinburgh castle.
Mrs May said her focus was to seek the best deal possible for the whole of the UK in the forthcoming Brexit negotiations with the EU. She added: “My message is clear – **** off! Sturgeon”.
In other news, 80’s children’s TV celebrity Jimmy Krankie has made an appeal to be photographed alongside Mrs Sturgeon, just to prove they are not the same person.
Mrs Sturgeon allegedly said the idea was Fan-Dabbie-Dozie..
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